How to shut a woman up

In the late eighties I had a disagreement with my best friend at the time, James. This was while I was still in the Army, and we were sitting in the messhall. Whatever the disagreement was about doesn't really matter, which is good because I can't even remember what it was about. What I remember was how quickly he managed to shut me up with just one simple sentence. He looked me straight in the eyes with this dead serious look and said to me, "Comb your eyebrows." I can only imagine the look on my face. I was so shocked by this sentence that I could not utter another word, he left me of all people speechless. Of course he was probably right, that was back in the day when I didn't know what a pair of tweezers were, let alone that a woman could have her eyebrows waxed. I didn't learn these things growing up because my mother was the type to rarely wear makeup let alone remove any unwanted facial hair. Then again if you remember anything about the eighties or Brooke Shields and her overgrown eyebrows it was probably the in thing. Who knows, thank goodness I eventually learned to tame the wild beasts, and of course nowadays I can look back on it and laugh. Now that I think about it I should probably tell him that, you know as men age they tend to have hair that gets out of control. You know on their backs, out of their ears, and over their eyes you might find something that resembles two caterpillers.